A Saturday with Morzant:
Morzant Poses a Hypothetical Question
to His Friends. Again.
MORZANT: Zulko, humans. No need to review your calendars. I’m indeed addressing you on a Saturday, rather than a Tuesday as I customarily do. I intended to ask my friends, as I did last year, what book released in the concluding year each would choose to take with them to a deserted island. Engrossed as I’ve been in my various experiments, I neglected to prepare this post before now. Given that this is the last day of 2011, I hurriedly assembled my friends.
Last year’s query was designed to enhance my understanding of hypothetical questions. The experiment rapidly dissolved into chaos as my friends insisted on altering the hypothetical question’s parameters. (That experiment is available for review here.) This year my friends have agreed to respect the question’s restrictions.
BIGFOOT: We’re ready, Morzant.
MORZANT: You’ve all signed the agreement, in triplicate?
BEVERLY: Yes. We’ve all signed your stupid papers. Now can we just get this over with? I’d like to get out of here before New Year’s Eve 2012.
MORZANT: Certainly. Each of you state which one book released in 2011 you would choose for your deserted island sequestration. We’ll start with the puppies.
LENNY: WON-TON: A CAT TALE TOLD IN HAIKU and—
MORZANT: Excuse me, Lenny, but there can be no “and.” Just one selection please.
LENNY: But I loved a lot of other books, too.
MORZANT: I understand. However, as per the agreement you signed, you’re to choose only the one book you loved best.
BIGFOOT: Actually, the agreement says we’re each allowed to pick up to twenty-one books.
MORZANT: Nonsense. Is states clearly right here that…. Oh, for the love of milky kitten whiskers! Who penciled in the number twenty?
NORMAN: Why are you looking at me?
MORZANT: Who else would tamper with my experiment?
NORMAN: Good point. But really, it wasn’t me this time.
MORZANT: And what’s this other scribbling? “Furthermore, each cryptid may also select any number of books released in this year from their ‘to-be-read pile’—those books they planned to, but did not have a chance to, read during 2011.” I demand to know who’s responsible for polluting my experiment!
BEVERLY: If it speeds things along, I am.
MORZANT: Have you no respect for science?
BEVERLY: Not particularly.
PENNY: Beverly didn’t do it.
MORZANT: Then who? Penny? Not you?
PENNY: I’m sorry! I respect science, I promise. But I couldn’t pick just one. I mean, there are a bunch of books I liked this year. And there are so many more I didn’t even get a chance to read!
BIGFOOT: Then it’s settled. We’ll all just make a huge list of books—
MORZANT: Wait a minute!
NORMAN: You’re the one who insisted we sign the agreement, Morzant. Now we have to stick to it.
MORZANT: Fine. If anybody needs me, I’ll be in the Hortozapher containment chamber, weeping.
The cryptids would bring the following books published in 2011 with them to a deserted island:
Books BIGFOOT read and loved:
BAD ISLAND
by Doug Tennapel
[YOUNG ADULT—GRAPHIC NOVEL]
Graphix-Scholastic
DARTH PAPER STRIKES BACK
by Tom Angleberger
[MIDDLE GRADE—SECOND IN THE ORIGAMI YODA SERIES]
Amulet-Abrams
THE END OF THE LINE
by Angela Cerrito
[YOUNG ADULT]
Holiday House
LEVEL UP
by Gene Luen Yang,
illustrated by Thien Pham
[YOUNG ADULT—GRAPHIC NOVEL]
First Second-Roaring Brook
Books BIGFOOT didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to while relaxing under a coconut tree:
DEAD END IN NORVELT
by Jack Gantos
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Farrar, Straus and Giroux
THE FINGERTIPS OF DUNCAN DORFMAN
by Meg Wolitzer
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Dutton-Penguin
MAGGIE & OLIVER OR A BONE OF ONE’S OWN
by Valerie Hobbs,
illustrated by Jennifer Thermes
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Henry Holt
NURSERY RHYME COMICS:
50 TIMELESS RHYMES FROM 50 CELEBRATED CARTOONISTS
edited by Chris Duffy
[COMIC FOR YOUNG READERS]
First Second-Roaring Brook
TRUE (…SORT OF)
by Katherine Hannigan
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Greenwillow-HarperCollins
THE UNFORGOTTEN COAT
by Frank Cottrell Boyce
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Candlewick
Books MORZANT read and loved:
(The experiment has already been tainted; therefore, I see no reason for me to comply with the original terms of my hypothetical question. Or, as the Earth saying goes: If you can’t beat them, join them.)
QUEEN OF THE FALLS
by Chris Van Allsburg
[PICTURE BOOK—NON-FICTION]
Houghton Mifflin
SWIRL BY SWIRL: SPIRALS IN NATURE
by Joyce Sidman,
illustrated by Beth Krommes
[PICTURE BOOK—NON-FICTION]
Houghton Mifflin-Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
THE WATCHER: JANE GOODALL’S LIFE WITH THE CHIMPS
by Jeanette Winter
[PICTURE BOOK—NON-FICTION]
Houghton Mifflin-Houghton Mifflin Harcourt
Books MORZANT didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to after studying indigenous island snails:
THE DEAD
by Charlie Higson
[YOUNG ADULT—SECOND IN THE ENEMY SERIES]
Hyperion-Disney
THE INCREDIBLE LIFE OF BALTO
by Meghan McCarthy
[PICTURE BOOK—NON-FICTION]
Knopf-Random House
THE UNDERTAKERS: RISE OF THE CORPSES
by Ty Drago
[YOUNG ADULT]
Sourcebooks Jabberwocky
Book MORTIMER read and loved:
GUINEA PIG, PET SHOP PRIVATE EYE #4: FISH YOU WERE HERE
by Colleen AF Venable,
illustrated by Stephanie Yue
[SILLY FUZZY BOOK]
Graphic Universe-Lerner
Book MORTIMER didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to from the comfort of his tiny island hut:
MOUSENET
by Prudence Breitrose,
with illustrations by Stephanie Yue
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Hyperion-Disney
Books PENNY read and loved:
ANYA’S GHOST
by Vera Brosgol
[YOUNG ADULT—GRAPHIC NOVEL]
First Second-Roaring Brook
THE GIRL BEHIND THE GLASS
by Jane Kelley
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Random House
WHITE CROW
by Marcus Sedgwick
[YOUNG ADULT]
Roaring Brook
Books PENNY didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to while drifting along on a warm ocean current:
THE AVIARY
by Kathleen O’Dell
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Knopf-Random House
BLINK & CAUTION
by Tim Wynne-Jones
[YOUNG ADULT]
Candlewick
BREATH OF ANGEL
by Karyn Henley
[YOUNG ADULT—FIRST IN THE
ANGELAEON CIRCLE TRILOGY]
WaterBrook Multnomah-Random House
THE ISLE OF BLOOD
by Rick Yancey
[YOUNG ADULT—THIRD IN THE MONSTRUMOLOGIST SERIES]
Simon & Schuster
THE NAME OF THE STAR
by Maureen Johnson
[YOUNG ADULT—FIRST IN THE SHADES OF LONDON TRILOGY]
Putnam-Penguin
RETURN TO DAEMON HALL: EVIL ROOTS
by Andrew Nance,
with illustrations by Coleman Polhemus
[YOUNG ADULT—SEQUEL TO DAEMON HALL]
Henry Holt
IMAGINARY GIRLS
by Nova Ren Suma
[YOUNG ADULT]
Dutton-Penguin
THE SCORPIO RACES
by Maggie Stiefvater
[YOUNG ADULT]
Scholastic
THE VISION
by Jen Nadol
[YOUNG ADULT—SEQUEL TO THE MARK]
Bloomsbury USA
Books NORMAN read and loved:
SCARY SCHOOL
by Derek the Ghost,
with illustrations by Scott M. Fischer
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Harper-HarperCollins
WITCHES’ BREW
by Mary Labatt,
illustrated by Jo Rioux
[GRAPHIC NOVEL—FOURTH IN THE SAM & FRIENDS MYSTERY SERIES]
Kids Can Press
Books NORMAN didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to while lounging on a big hot rock:
ALIENS ON VACATION
by Clete Smith,
with illustrations by Christian Slade
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Hyperion-Disney
THE BOY AT THE END OF THE WORLD
by Greg van Eekhout
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Bloomsbury USA
BREADCRUMBS
by Anne Ursu,
with illustrations by Erin Mcguire
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Walden Pond-HarperCollins
MISSING ON SUPERSTITION MOUNTAIN
by Elise Broach,
with illustrations by Antonio Javier Caparo
[MIDDLE GRADE—FIRST IN TRILOGY]
Henry Holt
MY VERY UNFAIRY TALE LIFE
by Anna Staniszewski
[MIDDLE GRADE—FIRST IN TRILOGY]
Sourcebooks Jabberwocky-Sourcebooks
THE ONLY ONES
by Aaron Starmer
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Delacorte-Random House
ZOMBIE MOMMY
by M.T. Anderson,
with illustrations by Kurt Cyrus
[MIDDLE GRADE—FIFTH IN THE PALS IN PERIL SERIES]
Beach Lane-Simon & Schuster
Books BEVERLY read and loved:
BONE DOG
by Eric Rohmann
[PICTURE BOOK]
Roaring Brook
A MONSTER CALLS
by Patrick Ness (based on an idea by Siobhan Dowd),
with illustrations by Jim Kay
[YOUNG ADULT]
Candlewick
THE VISCONTI HOUSE
by Elsbeth Edgar
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Candlewick
Books BEVERLY didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to while sunning herself on the beach:
LIKE PICKLE JUICE ON A COOKIE
by Julie Sternberg,
with illustrations by Matthew Cordell
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Amulet-Abrams
THE MIDNIGHT ZOO
by Sonya Hartnett,
with illustrations by Andrea Offermann
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Candlewick
MY NAME IS MINA
by David Almond
[MIDDLE GRADE—PREQUEL TO SKELLIG]
Delacorte-Random House
MY NAME IS NOT EASY
by Debby Dahl Edwardson
[YOUNG ADULT]
Marshall Cavendish
SMALL PERSONS WITH WINGS
by Ellen Booraem
[MIDDLE GRADE]
Dial-Penguin
Books OLIVER read and loved:
A BALL FOR DAISY
by Chris Raschka
[PICTURE BOOK]
Schwartz & Wade-Random House
ANIMALS HOME ALONE
by Loes Riphagen
[PICTURE BOOK]
Seven Footer Press
BLACKOUT
by John Rocco
[PICTURE BOOK]
Hyperion-Disney
NO DOGS ALLOWED!
by Linda Ashman,
illustrated by Kristin Sorra
[PICTURE BOOK]
Sterling
I MUST HAVE BOBO!
by Eileen Rosenthal,
illustrated by Marc Rosenthal
[PICTURE BOOK]
Atheneum-Simon & Schuster
PERFECT SQUARE
by Michael Hall
[PICTURE BOOK]
Greenwillow-HarperCollins
WHERE’S WALRUS?
by Stephen Savage
[PICTURE BOOK]
Scholastic Press-Scholastic, 2011
Book OLIVER didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to while cozied in a quiet island cave:
DAISY DAWSON AT THE BEACH
by Steve Voake,
with illustrations by Jessica Meserve
[CHAPTER BOOK]
Candlewick
Books LENNY read and loved:
CAT SECRETS
by Jef Czekaj
[PICTURE BOOK]
Balzer & Bray-HarperCollins
EARTH TO CLUNK
by Pam Smallcomb,
illustrated by Joe Berger
[PICTURE BOOK]
Dial-Penguin
RAJ THE BOOKSTORE TIGER
by Kathleen T. Pelley,
illustrated by Paige Keiser
[PICTURE BOOK]
Charlesbridge
WON TON: A CAT TALE TOLD IN HAIKU
by Lee Wardlaw,
illustrated by Eugene Yelchin
[PICTURE BOOK]
Henry Holt
Books VIOLET read and loved:
APPLE PIE ABC
by Alison Murray
[PICTURE BOOK]
Hyperion-Disney
BEAR WITH ME
by Max Kornell
[PICTURE BOOK]
Putnam-Penguin
MINI RACER
by Kristy Dempsey,
illustrated by Bridget Strevens-Marzo
[PICTURE BOOK]
Bloomsbury USA
ME…JANE
by Patrick McDonnell
[PICTURE BOOK]
Little, Brown-Hachette
MY NAME IS ELIZABETH!
by Annika Dunklee,
illustrated by Matthew Forsythe
[PICTURE BOOK]
Kids Can Press
SAY HELLO TO ZORRO!
by Carter Goodrich
[PICTURE BOOK]
Simon & Schuster
Book VIOLET didn’t get a chance to read,
but plans to read to her new friend, Orin the Iguana:
THE PRINCESS OF BORSCHT
by Leda Schubert,
illustrated by Bonnie Christensen
[PICTURE BOOK]
Roaring Brook
